Silly Sunday

I hadn't had much planned today, so when my mother called asking if I wanted to meet up with her at the local McDonald's for a sandwich and some conversation I readily said yes!

For the first time in our history of meeting up somewhere, she was there before I got there. Mom runs on her own clock. That clock runs fifteen minutes slow on a regular basis. We're used to it, so any family member wishing to meet her uses that fifteen minute window to their advantage. And, since the McDs we were meeting at was only three minutes from my house I took my time getting out of the house.

We had a good talk. Nothing specific, just gossip really ... and some of the comments my mother made reminded me of just how she doesn't hold back from speaking her mind. The older she gets, the more she speaks her mind!! She didn't aim any of her hostility towards me (thankfully) ... instead it was Aunt Silly who was her target of the day ... "that woman wouldn't know GOOD interior decorating from a bucket of shit" says my dear mother. She happens to be right, but to hear it out of the mouth of an eighty year old woman (who reminds me more of Hyacinth Bucket - pronounced Bouquet - from the brit-com "Keeping Up Appearances) still shocks me!

And of course, she had to let me hear all about Alien and the Loser ... how she asked for a Christmas list from them ... how she knows what she wants to give the Loser ... a home vasectomy kit!! I couldn't agree more about the vasectomy, but the guy sitting at the table next to us gasped loud enough to get our attention!

Our little get together was only an hour long, but we sure enjoyed ourselves.

Mom usually gives me some extra groceries when we meet up. She loves the deals at the store she shops, with their buy one get one free, and usually ends up buying way too much for her and Daddy's consumption, so I often benefit from it (and I know she does it on purpose - she's that kind of person). There were two bags of "over-bought" items, along with a package of bedsheets she claims she can't return to the store because she can't find the receipt (that's poppycock ... my mother holds on to receipts in her file system for years!). Yay!! I needed sheets, I'm down to only one rather worn set!!

Tomorrow is Single Son's birthday. 31!! I cannot be the mother of a 31 year old!! I'm way too young to have a kid that old!

We're celebrating by going to our favorite Chinese restaurant. Yum!!

A Little Humor - Musings of a Good Father on a Bad Day

Many years ago, before I'd ever even thought of becoming a parent (I was still in high school) my dad gave me a piece of paper he'd cut out of the newspaper - Ann Landers to be exact ... "The Childless Couple". Little did I know it would pretty much describe my motherhood years.

It's with great pleasure I share it with you now.

"The Childless Couple"

There is nothing sadder than a childless couple. It breaks my heart to see them relaxing around swimming pools in Florida, sitting all suntanned and miserable on the decks of their boats -- trotting off to Europe like lonesome fools. It's an empty life. Nothing but money to spend, more time to enjoy and a whole lot less to worry about.

The poor childless couple are so wrapped up in themselves, you have to feel sorry for them. They don't fight over the child's discipline, don't blame each other for the child's most obnoxious characteristics, and they miss all the fun of doing without for the child's sake. They just go along, doing whatever they want, buying what they want and liking each other. It's a pretty pathetic picture.

Everyone should have children. No one should be allowed to escape the wonderful experience that accompanies each stage in the development of the young -- the happy memories of sleepless nights, coughing spells, tantrums, diaper rash, debts, "dipso" baby sitters, saturated mattresses, emergencies and never-ending crises.

How dismal is the peaceful home without the constant childish problems that make a well-rounded life and an early breakdown; the tender, thoughtful discussions when the report card reveals the progeny to be one step below a moron; the end-of-the-day reunions with all the joyful happenings recited like well-placed blows to the temples.

Children are worth it. Every moment of anxiety, every sacrifice, every complete collapse pays off as a fine, sturdy adolescent is reached. The feeling of reward the first time you took the boy hunting -- he didn't mean to shoot you, the lad was excited. Remember how he cried? How sorry he was? And how much better you felt after the blood transfusion? These are the times a man with a growing son treasures -- memories that are captured forever in the heart and the limp.

Think back to the night of romantic adventure when your budding daughter eloped with the village idiot. What childless couple ever shared in the stark realism of that drama? Aren't you a better man for having lived richly, fully, acquiring that tic in your left eye? Could a woman without children touch the strength and heroism of your wife as she tried to fling herself out of the bedroom window?

The childless couple live in a vacuum. They fill their lonely days with golf, vacation trips, dinner dates, civic affairs, tranquility, leisure and entertainment. There is a terrifying emptiness without children, but the childless couple are too comfortable to know it.

You just have to look at them to see what the years have done: He looks boyish, unlined and rested; she's slim, well-groomed and youthful. It isn't natural. If they had had kids, they'd look like the rest of us -- worn out, wrinkled and exhausted.

A Little Humor

Many years ago, before I'd ever even thought of becoming a parent (I was still in high school) my dad gave me a piece of paper he'd cut out of the newspaper - Ann Landers to be exact ... "The Childless Couple". Little did I know it would pretty much describe my motherhood years.

It's with great pleasure I share it with you now.

"The Childless Couple"

There is nothing sadder than a childless couple. It breaks my heart to see them relaxing around swimming pools in Florida, sitting all suntanned and miserable on the decks of their boats -- trotting off to Europe like lonesome fools. It's an empty life. Nothing but money to spend, more time to enjoy and a whole lot less to worry about.

The poor childless couple are so wrapped up in themselves, you have to feel sorry for them. They don't fight over the child's discipline, don't blame each other for the child's most obnoxious characteristics, and they miss all the fun of doing without for the child's sake. They just go along, doing whatever they want, buying what they want and liking each other. It's a pretty pathetic picture.

Everyone should have children. No one should be allowed to escape the wonderful experience that accompanies each stage in the development of the young -- the happy memories of sleepless nights, coughing spells, tantrums, diaper rash, debts, "dipso" baby sitters, saturated mattresses, emergencies and never-ending crises.

How dismal is the peaceful home without the constant childish problems that make a well-rounded life and an early breakdown; the tender, thoughtful discussions when the report card reveals the progeny to be one step below a moron; the end-of-the-day reunions with all the joyful happenings recited like well-placed blows to the temples.

Children are worth it. Every moment of anxiety, every sacrifice, every complete collapse pays off as a fine, sturdy adolescent is reached. The feeling of reward the first time you took the boy hunting -- he didn't mean to shoot you, the lad was excited. Remember how he cried? How sorry he was? And how much better you felt after the blood transfusion? These are the times a man with a growing son treasures -- memories that are captured forever in the heart and the limp.

Think back to the night of romantic adventure when your budding daughter eloped with the village idiot. What childless couple ever shared in the stark realism of that drama? Aren't you a better man for having lived richly, fully, acquiring that tic in your left eye? Could a woman without children touch the strength and heroism of your wife as she tried to fling herself out of the bedroom window?

The childless couple live in a vacuum. They fill their lonely days with golf, vacation trips, dinner dates, civic affairs, tranquility, leisure and entertainment. There is a terrifying emptiness without children, but the childless couple are too comfortable to know it.

You just have to look at them to see what the years have done: He looks boyish, unlined and rested; she's slim, well-groomed and youthful. It isn't natural. If they had had kids, they'd look like the rest of us -- worn out, wrinkled and exhausted.

First Entry ....

There's nothing sadder than an empty blog. I need to fix that and fast.

Not a whole lot I'm gonna put here tonight, I already blogged over at the other blog site, but I just can't go to bed with a clear conscience knowing there's a blog without an entry.

I'm keeping this blog private, for obvious reasons ... like the fact I blog about my sometimes dysfunctional family (who am I kidding, mostly dysfunctional, but they sure put the fun in dysfunctional - or so I keep trying to persuade myself).

Can I say dysfunctional any more!?!?!

And I'll probably stick with my cutesy names for them, since I'll be cross posting on multiply. Don't need to confuse anyone with real names after soooo many years.

Geesh, how many years? I started originally over at Bebo some ten years or more ago, but that never gained popularity so I went to yahoo 360 until it started going wonky with all of the changes (before it's death), ya ... mybad, I abandoned ship. Just as I'm doing with mulitply ... thanks to their ads. I just tired of them all.

So, there's my first entry. Now comes the fun of figuring everything out!!

Friday ...

Oops, I told Amy I'd head right over to Blogger and set up my account.

Guess I'll do that in a few ... lol. One last Multiply blog, for old time's sake. Hehe ...

*****

Went to get my prescription refilled today. On the way it started to snow. Nothing big, a few flakes here or there. Melted as soon as they touched a surface. But definitely the first snow of the year.

Got home to read online that the road commission is laying off half of their employees ... that'll leave only 50 employees to drive the snow removal trucks this winter.

Which means it's going to be one long winter here!!

Add that no one ever remembers (well almost no one) how to drive in the snow ... I'm soooo not looking forward to dodging dodgy drivers on icy roads.

Gonna be fun!

*****

Then I get home to Single Son in one of his talkative moods. And I mean talkative!! LOL! Not something he usually is, that's for sure.

Then again, he was ticked off. See, he more than goes out of his way to be helpful to the Wrecking Crew ... "can you roll me a few packages of cigarettes" they ask (we all roll our ciggies here, it's cheaper) ... "can you sit Grandson for a few hours while I work" asks DIL of him, "oh, I left my laundry in the dryer, can you fold it and put it on our bed" she calls from work to ask Single Son ... yet he took a cookie (without permission) that DIL had baked  and got himself reamed a new arsehole for it. I told him he's a fool for doing *anything* for them, considering the way they take advantage of people!

Then again ... he verified that in fact they are looking for a new place to live. I wondered aloud how they think they're going to get a place, considering his recent truck repossessions they'll need a co-signer to rent - and his never having entered into a rental contract before. I'm NOT putting my name on any legal documents of theirs, and I highly doubt my ex would either.

I wish 'em luck ... they're going to need it.

But they are leaving ... one way or the other, they're leaving ... I'm fed up.

To those of you who have offered a reminder to me should I ever say they can move back a third time ... I told Single Son about your kind offers and he said you'll have to get behind him in line ... he has offered to shoot me should that ever happen.

But it won't ... really!!

And I'll have my blog entries here on Multiply to act as reminders as to why it will never happen.

Oh, that reminds me ... blog ... time to go set up my new blog at Blogger. Amy, you said it's possible to import blog entries to multiply right? I don't wanna forget my multiply buddies, ya know?

Thursday (already)

My, my ... where does the week go?

And here I'm up way too early. I've been up since 5 AM. That's what I get for going to bed early last night. Three or four hours a night is about all I can sleep anymore. This sucks. It's gotta change. I'm sure part of it is stress. Or all of it, who knows?

Weird thing is I try not to stress when I'm awake. I mean, as bad as things have been lately, they could always be worse, right?

It's that silver lining my Gigi (grandmother) taught me to always look for. Okay, so it's a bit tarnished presently ... but it's still there ...

*****

Single Son is up to his old tricks again. Practical jokes ... or serious, it's hard to tell with him.

He was out working in the yard yesterday when supposedly the fool from next door (the one whose yard was hit hard by my recent tree disaster) approaches him. As Single Son tells it, the neighbor asked "who is that old lady that lives in your house", to which dear Son replies "oh, she's just my mom. She's not entirely with it, if you know what I mean, She's pretty harmless and doesn't usually hurt others, but we do lock her in her room just to be safe".

Now, you and I know he was joking around ... the only problem seems to be that the neighbor he was talking to doesn't exactly possess an I.Q. high enough to recognize humor unless it's the Three Stooges.

This is the same neighbor who thought it was up to us to take care of his lawn up to the side of his house, so his side yard when untouched for two years. Hello Dumbass, we're not in the trailer park any more! You are to mow up to the property line, not the side of the neighbors house. Oy! Oh, and he's the neighbor that a few years ago called the cops on us all the time because I had Married Son remove a dangerous branch that hung over our driveway - the tree was on his property ... and he called and called for really piddly stupid things until the cops recognized he was only nit-picking out of revenge and they told him to stop harassing us.

So now they think I'm totally mental. This could be a good thing, really. Maybe now their kids will stay out of my yard or stop slicing golf balls in the direction of our vehicles.

However, Single Son needs to realize that not everyone gets his dry sense of humor.

*****

I'm debating if I want to go back to bed for an hour or two, or if I just get up now, get dressed and head up to Target to refill my prescription. I'm thinking of a flu shot, too, but doubt they'll let me get it since I've had a sore throat for the last day or two.

Hmmmm, bed wins ... but only because Single Son just came into my room to tell me he's got to be in traffic court by 9 AM (remember he's a cop, they go to court a lot, LOL) ... and did I need the car before noon?

Election Day

And I'm sooooo glad it's over!

One more nasty political commercial and I would have screamed bloody murder! Don't know about you, but the majority of the candidates here in Michigan were dirty players this year ... only a small handful refused to play that game. Not surprising that they won whatever they were running for ... I think we're all sick of the mud slingers, nay sayers, and creeps who partake in it.

Ah well, we've got, what ... a year? ... until the campaigning for the 2012 elections start. Enjoy the quiet while it lasts!!

I'm happy with the new governor we will have here in Michigan ... Rick Snider, better known as "One Tough Nerd" ... he wants to "re-invent Michigan" ... and from his ten step plan, I do think he is on the right track ... we can't save the "old" Michigan ... but we sure as hell can re-invent it!

I went to vote and DILs dad was a few people in front of me. He asked if DIL had voted yet, I told him I didn't think so. What I should have told him was the conversation she and I had not twenty minutes earlier in the aisles of the grocery store where we bumped into each other ... pretty sad conversation at that. She asked if it was a presidential election ... Hullo?? Are you serious (yes, very) ... and I told her no ... it was a mid-term election (she didn't know what mid-term meant) and that we were casting our votes for the new governor of Michigan. "I don't know who the candidates are, so I guess I won't vote." To which I replied "then don't bitch one word to anyone if you don't like the changes that will be made. Not voting revokes your right to bitch about it".

*****

I've been doing some marathon video viewing. It took me a few days, but I watched the entire boxed set of "Keeping Up Appearances". That's including not only all of the episodes but the extras, the interviews, behind the scenes, and out takes, too.

Tonight I could either have started all over again, OR spent time reading my copy of "Hyacinth Bucket's Book of Etiquette for The Socially Less Fortunate". Yes, I chose to read the book.

I found the "Hyacinth Bucket Book of Cookery" online quite a while back. I printed out all two hundred pages (two ink cartridges later!!) ... and have been browsing through it, too. Some of the recipes sound soooo yummy!

I even ordered the "Hyacinth Bucket's Hectic Social Calendar" book today on amazon.com. I tell ya, those free $5 gift cards I have earned from swagbucks.com sure have come in handy!! Not an hour after I ordered it, the seller shipped it off! I can't wait! I've wanted that book forever ... yes, I'm a Hyacinth addict!! And I bought it for 88 cents (plus 3.99 S&H). What a deal!!

So I guess I know why I've had strange dreams these last few days ... ummmm, nights ... about Hyacinth, her home, and biscuit recipes of all things. American breakfast biscuits, not British biscuits (cookies to us). And that I know the difference shows I'm an addict! LOL!

Now I think I need to see a professional to analyze this addiction I have to all things Hyacinth (besides the fact that my mother possesses quite a few Hyacinth traits).

*****

Geesh, I need a life!!

I still haven't heard from that one company ... Target, by the way ... but from my understanding they do take their time getting back to applicants, especially when it's for seasonal workers (for which I applied). I'm guessing they just don't want to start paying seasonals until just before the holiday season begins. LOL.

In the meantime, I've also applied to about three dozen other retail places. Somethings gotta give sooner or later.

And the sooner the better.

Married Son and I are at odds again. We rarely speak, and when we do it ends in harsh words being spoken. I'm selfish (don't you know) because I demand they pay certain bills in exchange for rent. And of course, I call them selfish because not only is it a fight to get his share of the bills paid - but there's a new (new to them) truck sitting in my driveway. Now, I know he needs a vehicle, but priority says pay the heat bill FIRST (and not saying "gee, Mom, I don't have it this month"). He claims it was a repayment for a debt from a former friend of his, but I really don't believe that.

They don't think I've noticed, but you'd have to be a total moron to not see that they're sorting their possessions. I mean, really, how hard is it to notice when the sorting/storage tubs are stacked three high in my previously empty hallway?

They do this when they're getting ready to move. I guess it'll save me having to serve eviction notice at the end of the year. But he better pay me what he owes me first!! Or I know I'll never see it again.

But ... there's a lesson in this all. I will not ... I repeat NOT ... ever allow them to move back in with me. I know I said it in the past and broke down ... but no more!! I'm finished. Done. How's the saying go? Screw me once it's your fault, screw me twice it's my fault ... there won't be a third. And there sure won't be ... I'm a slow learner, but I've learned. Really.

*****

Okay, now my headache is back. Single Son put some videos on the network drive ... think I'll go watch either "Who Framed Roger Rabbit" or "The Muppet Movie" ... or maybe ... hmmmmm ... decisions, decisions ...