I hadn't had much planned today, so when my mother called asking if I wanted to meet up with her at the local McDonald's for a sandwich and some conversation I readily said yes!
For the first time in our history of meeting up somewhere, she was there before I got there. Mom runs on her own clock. That clock runs fifteen minutes slow on a regular basis. We're used to it, so any family member wishing to meet her uses that fifteen minute window to their advantage. And, since the McDs we were meeting at was only three minutes from my house I took my time getting out of the house.
We had a good talk. Nothing specific, just gossip really ... and some of the comments my mother made reminded me of just how she doesn't hold back from speaking her mind. The older she gets, the more she speaks her mind!! She didn't aim any of her hostility towards me (thankfully) ... instead it was Aunt Silly who was her target of the day ... "that woman wouldn't know GOOD interior decorating from a bucket of shit" says my dear mother. She happens to be right, but to hear it out of the mouth of an eighty year old woman (who reminds me more of Hyacinth Bucket - pronounced Bouquet - from the brit-com "Keeping Up Appearances) still shocks me!
And of course, she had to let me hear all about Alien and the Loser ... how she asked for a Christmas list from them ... how she knows what she wants to give the Loser ... a home vasectomy kit!! I couldn't agree more about the vasectomy, but the guy sitting at the table next to us gasped loud enough to get our attention!
Our little get together was only an hour long, but we sure enjoyed ourselves.
Mom usually gives me some extra groceries when we meet up. She loves the deals at the store she shops, with their buy one get one free, and usually ends up buying way too much for her and Daddy's consumption, so I often benefit from it (and I know she does it on purpose - she's that kind of person). There were two bags of "over-bought" items, along with a package of bedsheets she claims she can't return to the store because she can't find the receipt (that's poppycock ... my mother holds on to receipts in her file system for years!). Yay!! I needed sheets, I'm down to only one rather worn set!!
Tomorrow is Single Son's birthday. 31!! I cannot be the mother of a 31 year old!! I'm way too young to have a kid that old!
We're celebrating by going to our favorite Chinese restaurant. Yum!!
Hope you enjoy the meal. Am imagining Hyacinth thinking of a home vasectomy kit, lol
ReplyDeleteAnother thing we have in common - my mother always has an endless supply of things she's bought and didn't use!
LOL! Just remember the *real* Hyacinth is in total denial that her Sheridan is anything but the perfect child. Although, I'm sure she would have invented such a thing for their Daisy's Stephanie's daughter and not knowing which hippie was the father of the child (remember the episode about the Baptism?)
ReplyDeleteI think my mum shops in excess only so that I can relieve her of her surplus cupboard stock. I'm often the recipient of full packages of toilet tissue, shampoo, dish soap, food supplies, and other things, including an occasional small kitchen appliance or linens.
Now, it's Daddy who likes to purchase for the sake of purchasing. He's homebound for the most part because of his stroke, but that doesn't stop him from shopping thanks to the internet!
I love Hyacinth - my one sister is a bit like her but I'm not sure whether I'm Rose or Daisy!
ReplyDeleteMy Dad is the one who does the shopping because my Mum is housebound - she's convinced she should have a laptop so she could order on line because he sometimes gets the wrong things. We had fits of giggles when I stayed up there recently - I went to have a shower, she said he'd bought a new bottle of shower gel and I'm left standing there in a towel with a bottle of hand wash!
I'm sooo glad that Brother Deere does not blog!! I'd have to say he's the most Hyacinth-like member of our family - although there's a lot of Hyacinths in training! I swear!!
ReplyDeleteI'm more like Daisy, with a touch of Violet. Of course, there's no Onslo or Bruce in my life! Not anymore anyway, LOL.
How funny!! Handwash!! Ah well, it's better than nothing in a bind!! I've had to use shampoo before when there's been no shower gel. I refuse to use bar soap, it's just too harsh on my sensitive skin (if that's not a Hyacinth statement I don't know what is!)
Warning if you do decide to get your mum a laptop, it's addictive! My dad spends hours upon hours on his desktop ... mostly playing solitaire. He's approaching one million solitaire hands played (really, it's ALL he does, and has done for a dozen years now - besides forward everyone in his email addy book jokes, jokes, jokes).