I needed to borrow the van only to be told once again "there's no gas in it", so I asked her "what are you doing putting five dollars in it at a time?" "Yes, I am. You need to pay for the gas you use" she says.
How about I drive the freaking thing less than fifteen miles a week? Or that that van is the vehicle I rely on since Gizmo killed my car?
Forget getting a replacement ... he's been listening to her shit and now believes he does not need to replace my vehicle.
Of course, we fought ... fought like Gizmo and I have never fought. I honestly thought that he was going to take a swing at me! Then again, go ahead, I wouldn't hesitate to call the police for domestic abuse ... I've done it before. I'll do it again.
I reminded her that where else could they live for $300 a month? She has the audacity to tell me I need to get a job if I expect to have a say in this house ... that it's Gizmo's house since he pays for TWO of the bills (only two) ... HELLO? Really.
Gizmo is now saying he's not going to pay for any of the bills that he had been paying. If that's the case he's out tomorrow. I'm not going to let them live here for free.
Then just to "show me" one last thing, he takes the spare van key off of my keyring. And that's supposed to upset me how? I mean, grow up dammit.
I'm so done ... fed up beyond belief.
So much so that I actually called my mom, in tears, to talk to her. I usually try to keep her away from my stresses, she doesn't do stress well ... but there's a time when a gal just needs her mom!! She was a great help calming me down, but to say she's disappointed with Gizmo's behavior is an understatement.
The way he treated me tonight should have been a warning to Gadget. If a man treats his mother THAT way, he's capable of treating his girlfriend that way!! And he was ugly. She may be his girlfriend for now, but I will always be his mother. To be treated with the disrespect I have witnessed from him lately hurts to say the least.
But I'll get over it. Maybe not soon, but in time (and distance) I will.
In the meantime, I'm job hunting like I've never job hunted before.
Whatever happened to treating others as you would want them to treat you?? Respect is earned ... don't expect it yet treat someone like crap. It seems to be too much to ask of some people.
*****
Oh, I was supposed to blog something positive, too, wasn't I? Let's see ... positive ... nope, can't think of a thing ... other than the walk I took around the block in 28 degree weather, in the dark ... to clear my head tonight. It helped ... I think.
I wish I was there so we could go out and have a cup of coffee (although personally I think this deserves at least one drink) and I'd listen for as long as you need to talk. You see the situation as a partnership, where you provide a place for them to live and they help you out by paying some rent and some utilities. She sees it as they are living with you as a favor because you need financial help and I imagine she'd much rather have her own place and is frustrated that he's not eager to move out. And he probably feels torn - which does not excuse his behavior in the lesst - but maybe explains it a bit. Now - as far as the van (cause I know you need wheels on occasion) if the issue with the van was that there was no gas in it - could you maybe have taken it out and put five bucks in it yourself? I'm not saying you should have to do that mind you, I'm just asking if you have considered taking the approach of countering the objection. I'm going to guess that you really need him to pay those two bills at least for the shortterm future - so can you make peace and plot secretly? And most importantly - remember, no matter if he is your son - he's also his father's son - and I'm going to guess that there is some "men behaving badly" in his background.....again, not an excuse, just an explanation. Since I'm not there, let me just send hugs......this too shall pass.
ReplyDeleteEm, he pays NO rent, just the gas and electric bills, a grand total of $241 a month! I pay four bills totaling about the same amount, and mom provides us with garbage, water and sewer and property taxes. I would put about two bucks of gas in it, but after the fight Gizmo took my van key away from me and I am NOT going begging for the freaking key from Gadget. No way, no how.
ReplyDeleteTonight, the toilet paper Gizmo buys has disappeared (luckily I have a 12 roll package in "storage", and yes I make them provide the t.p. since they use a roll in about a day and a half compared to my roll in a week and a half). She's on her damned "power trip" ... it's so I'm about ready to tell her to grow the F up and stop with her childish games, or she can take their showers (and laundry) elsewhere since they aren't paying the water bill!!
I had called her a nasty name last night in the heat of the fight, and had every intention of being mature and apologizing for it tonight ... until 1) I saw her in the hallway coming out of the bathroom with her jacket on. As soon as she saw me she put her jacket over her head (like if I can't see her, she can't see me)and makes a mad dash down the stairs to their bedroom ... and 2) this juvenile bs with the little games she plays.
I don't expect Gizmo to have an easy time with this, nor do I expect him to choose sides, but he could at least "call her to the carpet" like he does me. She's a big girl ... or is she?
I can't handle a 36 year old juvenile. I won't ... if she chooses to live in her boyfriends mother's basement, well so be it ... I had tried to be nice, tried to welcome her into my home with open arms, and this is the thanks I get?
Along with my own son accusing me of being the bitch because I refuse to let her walk all over me and use me the way she does him?
I've got a lead on a good job. I sent my resume in and am waiting on a call from the gal tomorrow. If it's a tenth as good as the head-hunter said it is, a month's pay and they're out of here ... AND I'll be able to take over the garbage, and water and sewer bills from my mom!
And yes, there's men behaving badly in his background ... his father was extremely abusive to not only me but to my sons.
A drink does sound good!!!
Once this is all over, and I have a car again ... we're going to have to do a meet-up with Amy!!
Count me in!
ReplyDelete