The year was 1968, Valentine's Day. I was in the second grade. It was actually a few days after Valentine's Day that we had our big Second Grade Valentine's Day Play. As I recited the above line I looked out over the audience to see my mother there with my brand new baby brother. Suddenly the stage fright I was experiencing disappeared when I saw them, him sleeping quietly in Mom's arms.
Little were any of us to realize that 25 years later he'd leave us. Suicide. The hole left in our hearts by his death will never fully heal.
Today is his birthday. He'd have turned 40 today.
I find it difficult to type right now. So many memories, so many emotions that it's hard to organize my thoughts into anything intelligent ...
Instead, I'll just wish my little brother a Happy Birthday. I love you. I miss you.
Little were any of us to realize that 25 years later he'd leave us. Suicide. The hole left in our hearts by his death will never fully heal.
Today is his birthday. He'd have turned 40 today.
I find it difficult to type right now. So many memories, so many emotions that it's hard to organize my thoughts into anything intelligent ...
Instead, I'll just wish my little brother a Happy Birthday. I love you. I miss you.
I'm so sorry for your tremendous loss. He is at peace now where no more suffering can touch him and no more sadness or despair. You'll see one another again one day and what a reunion that will be! Meanwhile you're missing him. Lord, touch her heart with your peace and mercy and healing. For Lisa and the family who is left behind to grieve.
ReplyDeleteHold him close to you Lord and preserve him to the time of reuniting. Thank you now for what you are doing in her life.
In Christ's Holy Name, Amen Hugga hugga to you sweetpea. Love you much. Your friend, Dana
P.S. I lost a beloved cousin to this same thing 2 years ago and I still cry for her from time to time.
I love you and I know that your brother watches over you...I'm sorry that this day brings with it a painful memory, there are good memories of him too...try to concentrate on those thoughts hun. Goddess Bless...(((HUGS)))!
ReplyDeleteYou're not the only one that misses him. Everyone does. I do, even though I didn't know him so well. I love him and I miss him too!
ReplyDeleteDana, Thank you, on these milestone days it's hard to remember much but the pain of missing a loved one. This is also the week of the fifteenth anniversary of the death of my grandmother.
ReplyDeleteThank you, too, for your prayers.
HUGS!!
Hannah, I love you, too!! Thanks ... I was up half the night, alternating between crying because I miss him and laughing at some of the weirder memories. Yup, he was as weird as I am. Definitely have a butt-load of good memories I need to be thinking of today.
ReplyDeleteDecided that I'm going to do something *good* for myself today. Gonna go get a hair cut. Something new. Different.
Then head off for my evening class. Teacher said she's bringing in candy. I've been a good girl today. Really watching my sugar intake so I can have some of those goodies. Even thinking of stopping at the store to get a bag of candies to pass around to the class.
Love you!! MWAH ... and huggles ...
Alien, ::hugs babygurl:: I know you do, honey. You probably don't remember, but you were his little Princess. You were also scared to death of him ... he was tall (5'10" and muscular). Don't know why you were scared of him, he was so gentle. He hated that you'd run from him. On his 25th birthday you gave him the bestest gift (his words), when you not only took a chocolate chip cookie from him, but you actually climbed up in his lap and sat for the longest time. Good memories ... good memories ...
ReplyDeleteHUGS!!
Wow...what a memory. And what a way to remember Valentine's Day. I'll be thinking of you today....hang in there and find your happy place.
ReplyDelete(hugs)
What bitter sweet memories.
ReplyDeleteI can relate to the memories and emotions of losing a little brother. hugs!!