[11:02:46 PM] Alien: Hey
[11:03:01 PM] Me: Hi
[11:03:56 PM] Me: So what's up? Your brother says you're looking for me
[11:04:53 PM] Alien: I was going to see if u had 5 bucks I could barrow til tmrw
[11:05:01 PM] Me: Sorry, I'm broke
[11:05:29 PM] Alien: Okay.
[11:05:41 PM] Alien: THats fine.
[11:05:42 PM] Me: sorry ...
[11:05:46 PM] Alien: Its okay.
[11:06:10 PM] Me: you know how it goes with me ... I never have cash, LOL
[11:06:58 PM] Alien: Lol
Being broke isn't exactly true ... but the not having cash on me is true. Besides ... she needs money she can ask that idiot *fiance* of hers!
Notice how much time passes between that last message and the next one ...
[11:13:19 PM] Alien: Does Grandma and Grandpa know about me yet?
[11:13:44 PM] Me: know about you? what? I haven't heard anything from you yet about what's going on
[11:14:00 PM] Alien: I'm pregnant
[11:14:42 PM] Me: Yeah, and I had to find out thru myspace. I'm not too happy that you couldn't talk to me and let me know. hell of a way to find out, you know?
[11:14:55 PM] Alien: I'm sorry.
[11:15:10 PM] Me: Were you afraid I'd blow up?
[11:15:15 PM] Alien: No
[11:15:39 PM] Me: so why didn't you tell me?
[11:15:49 PM] Alien: Idk
[11:16:13 PM] Me: I don't either.
[11:16:43 PM] Alien: So they don't know about me yet?
[11:16:54 PM] Me: nope. not my place to tell them either
[11:17:07 PM] Alien: When should (J) meet them?
[11:17:44 PM] Me: my initial answer ... never ... but i guess they'll have to. you better tell him how he needs to act around them ...
Another pause ...
[11:21:30 PM] Alien: i already have
[11:21:57 PM] Me: good ...
[11:22:30 PM] Alien: how should i tell them this?
[11:22:43 PM] Me: How ever you think best.
[11:22:50 PM] Alien: ok
Ten minutes have passed since our last exchange of messages. I'm not stressing. I'm not upset. I won't let this get to me. She's determined to grow up ... bad choices and all. All we can do is hope that eventually she'll wise up. Yeah ... she's got the commitment of raising this child for the rest of her life ...
I waited 15 minutes from that last message before I posted:
[11:37:18 PM] Lisa: Guess I head on outta here. Love ya. Niters
So ... I've officially been told. Alright, it was through a Skype Instant Message. I just had a feeling it wouldn't be face to face.
I never got a response before I logged off. I think that's what hurts the most ... being avoided and not being told "I love you, Mom" back. I don't hate her ... I'm not happy with her choices lately, but dammit, I don't hate her.
Sometimes I wonder if we're ever going to get chance to do the things we want without the stress and worry of our kids! I try my hardest to let them do their own thing but you still can't help worrying and I know they don't even realise they are hurting us - I can really empathise with you, I'm still on an emotional roller coaster with my son, every time I think he's grown-up a bit he's here needing me to sort out another drama for him. Hugs from one single Mom to another xx
ReplyDeleteI reckon the "single son intervention" was necessary so she could be sure you'd talk to her if she messaged you.....but I'm glad she got over her fear and made contact.
ReplyDeleteYou weren't avoided......lots of things could have been happening on her end that she had to leave suddenly - heck she might even have been crying and just too upset to continue - or perhaps someone else appeared that she didn't want to have know what she was doing.
Hang in there and remember that you are the experienced adult and she is, for all her bluster, still a kid.......so look at the things that she's doing - not the ones she isn't.
And as for this needing money late at night....was that maybe a try to see if the two of you could meet somewhere? I'm not sure how else she was expecting to get five bucks from you.
Awww...she'll come around. A girl ALWAYS needs her mama! She contacted you to begin with...that's a start! She probably feels dumb because things are sinking in and she's getting scared...though she'd NEVER admit that to you! Just hang in there...she'll contact you again soon.
ReplyDeleteYou're doing great, by the way! All you can really do in this situation is exactly what you're doing.
Didnt take long to come visit and 'face' you after these messages LOL.
ReplyDeleteaND YOU GOT THE i LOVE YOU IN PERSON TAHTS EVEN BETTER!